Hello there, brave new world.

I've been 25 for going on an hour and a half, so I think that the maturity that goes with having a less expensive car rental fee (to say nothing of car insurance) has probably sunk in by now.

So let's talk about my last day as a 24 year old.

Sorry, Jack. I can't help you anymore.

Most of it, I spent working on a powerpoint presentation for my tutoring group. PowerPoint? Surely it's not two words. Firefox isn't saying that the double caps version is misspelled, so I will defer on this issue. I did have a lovely-ish workout this morning. Some ladies (not the LADIES sort of ladies, but rather the older, wedding ringed, "I'm here because my husband can afford the gym membership and I need something to do" ladies, not that there's anything wrong with that) were in the way of the machines where I get my chest all swoll.

So swoll.

 And, of course, it continues to be far too cold for ALMOST APRIL. I MEAN COME ON. MOMMA CAMERON KNEW THAT SHE WANTED A SON WITH AN UNDAMAGED HEAD AND A BIRTHDAY THAT FELL IN WONDERFUL WEATHER. This is ridiculous, winter. You're drunk, and Charleston is not where you want to vacation. You're on your way to Chile or some such (where it's chilly. See what I did there? This right here is some classy and original comedy. You're probably laughing pretty hard right now. I'll wait.)

We're done waiting.

Anyway, yes. I spent most of it on a presentation for my tutoring group. They seemed to enjoy it. There was skull anatomy and nerves galore. Hopefully it helps them. But, really, that's not what I'm here for.

I also went to trivia, where we won shots. There were some questions I should have gotten, and there were some that we shouldn't have but did anyway (because we're cool like that). We even stayed a while (with Chantal, Sneezy, and Platinum Chainz) to ring in my birthday with more booze than was ideal and a few wonderful songs. People were looking at us weird. It's a bit of a hipster bar. They don't understand our joy. Assholes. Well, okay, it's a little awkward trying to sing along to a song in a group of four while you're standing off on your own in a little pack. DON'T HATE.

But anyway. Late is the hour and such. Here's what I REALLY wanted to talk about. If you've ever doubted how FREAKING AMAZING Charleston is, well, shame on you, because you're just wrong, but also, here's something to convince you otherwise.

I'm driving home, and I'm waiting at a red light. I see a young lady escorting a clearly intoxicated fellow home. This fellow has a tattoo along his right flank and axilla. How could I know such things, you may wonder. Well, this fellow also did not have a shirt and was stumbling quite a bit. I almost offered them a ride, but I remembered being rebuffed for a similar offer while in college, and I figured that I'd see how it went.

Sure enough, the young lady had things well in hand. She was-

Hold on. Important bulletin. Having read previous posts, you know how much I love Neil Gaiman and how much I would have his children if I had the proper reproductive machinery. Seeing as I don't, I'll have to pay it forward to him by posting a link to this poll. It's a Time Magazine poll for the Top 100 People of 2013. I think he should be on the Top 100 People of Ever, but that's just me. Give him some love here.

I will write slash-fiction between him and David Bowie if need be. AND IT WILL BE, well, just terrible, because I'm not great at fiction. We should know this from the last post of Novemblog, with the repeatedly capitalized N's to go for the Aristocrats joke.

Anyway, the young lady had things well in hand. She escorted him across a potentially busy intersection with no problem. And that's awesome. Truly, she is wonderful and a keeper, and he should do nothing to earn her ire (and probably shouldn't have had so much to drink).

However, he HAD had so much to drink, so the point was moot. The important thing is what happened right after they crossed the street.

He moved to the other side of the curb.

I like to think that they had just recently crossed from the other side of the street and that his balance wasn't yet up to snuff, so he let her walk closer to the street for a spell. But as soon as his equilibrium returned, you know what happened?

He moved to the other side of the curb.

And they say chivalry is dead.